MJ and her kids were over the other day. MJ is one of my closest friends and a real mentor when it comes to mom-things.
All of our kids were sitting around a little picnic table when a familiar sound erupted from Milo's bottom. All the kids laughed and Annabella said, "Milo, say 'excuse me' when you do a bottom burp, please!"
MJ looked at me and mouthed the words "bottom burp?"
"I can't stand the word 'fart,'" I whispered back to her.
It's true. I can't stand saying it. I can't stand hearing it and I can't stand my kids saying it, so when they asked what it was, I just called it a bottom burp and it stuck. "I'm actually surprised it's lasted this long," I tell her, with a hint of pride in my voice.
"Yeah, but if they say that in elementary school, they'll get killed!"
I'd honestly never thought of it this way, but ever since MJ said this I couldn't stop thinking about the other ways I've sheltered my children that could prove dangerous in their school years. Take this conversation, for example:
ANNABELLA: Sophie was sad at camp today because her mom wouldn't let her bring her Webkinz.
ME: What are Webkinz? (Of course, I know what Webkinz are, but I don't want her to know that.)
ANNABELLA: Oh, they're like regular animals. But with spikes.
Annabella is five and the boys are three and they've played with their cousins' Gameboy a few times, but other than that, they know as much about video games as they know about sex. Annabella has heard her friends talk about Hannah Montana, but I'm pretty sure she also thinks that a Hannah Montana is like a regular animal, but with spikes.
I know this innocence won't last forever and I think it's OK for me to keep some things away from my kids at this stage in their life.
<cue "Sex and the City" music>
I couldn't help but wonder, should we feel guilty about purposely keeping things from our children?