No Naps: A Play in 7 Acts

Last month I made the cocky assertion that Milo and Huck were going to stay in their cribs until they went to college.

I think they heard me.

On Sunday, September 2nd the unthinkable happened. It was naptime and the boys were quiet in their cribs. We assumed that this meant that they were sleeping, but what they were really doing was plotting.

We heard the door open with it's signature creak, a very different creak than the sound of Annabella's door. Then we heard little boy voices, conspiring voices. A few seconds later we saw Milo and Huck walking down the stairs. My heart sank into my stomach. Goodbye hours between 1pm and 3pm. Goodbye naptime.

Rather than bore you with all the specifics, I wrote this little play. Enjoy!

MONDAY - CONSEQUENCES

Me: I am going to take your trains away if you climb out of your cribs one more time.

Them: Here are my trains!

TUESDAY - BRIBERY

Me: If you stay in your crib we'll go to the pool and go swimming after naptime.

Them: I don't want to go swimming.

WEDNESDAY - NONCHALANCE

Me: If you get out of your crib I am not going to talk to you or look at you. I am just going to put you back in your crib and leave the room.

Them: Mommy, I'm out of my bed! Don't look at me!

THURSDAY - TRICKERY (AKA "QUIET TIME")

Me: You don't have to sleep. You just have to play quietly in your cribs.

Them: OK. (Five minutes of laughing and shouting later.) Hi Mom. We're done playing quietly in our cribs.

FRIDAY - LATER NAP

Me: Stay in your cribs. Stay in your cribs. Stay in your cribs. Please, stay in your cribs.

Them: No! No! No!

They finally fall asleep at 4:30 and when they're still sleeping at 6 pm I wake them up. They don't fall asleep until 9pm that night.

SATURDAY - NO NAP

Us: :(

Them: :(

SUNDAY - BABY GATE ON THEIR DOOR

Us: You can play quietly in your rooms and take a nap if you feel like it.

Them: (After an hour of play.) Mom! Dad! We're ready for you to let us out of our cage!

Us:

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