Big Belly

Annabella has an enormous belly. It is round and beautiful and she has recently developed an endearing habit of patting it when she is happy. Why not? It is right there where her hands naturally fall and it makes a satisfying slapping sound.

I would tell you that Annabella is fat, if I weren't afraid of getting kicked out of the "mother of the year" competition. But, let's face it. She's fat. She's not fat in an "at risk for heart disease" way. She's fat and healthy. The doctor says so. And we all know that doctors know everything (particularly if they tell you what you want to hear.)

Still, at the gym yesterday I looked around and suddenly had the revelation that because Annabella is a girl, American, white, and living the 21st century, there is a very good chance that she will expend a lot of energy worrying about her weight. She will do this for the rest of her life. This revelation made me sadder than I think I could explain to you here.

I want Annabella to be kind. I want her to be smart. I want her to be brave. But I think most of all I want her to be comfortable in her own skin.

Comments

[WheelMan]

With you as her mother, I'm sure Annabella will have all of the qualities you want for her and more! :)

[Kacy]

No true words have been said...that should be the wish of all mothers to their daughters...No to judge themseleves by a magazine cover; but to judge that cover against themselves.

[PJ]

We live in a world where how we look is judged superior to who we are. I've only just begun to read your blog, yet I can sense that you are the kind of mother who will help her daughter to feel good about herself, no matter what society dictates.

[KC Lemson]

This is the reason I was almost relieved to have a boy... I don't know how to raise a girl in a way that she won't struggle with her self esteem her entire life.

[del]

Do not worry about "A" just let those little legs get up and running and she will lose that small amount of baby fat.

[Jennifer]

I understand totally what you are saying. Just keep doing what you are doing and she will be happy and kind and healthy...everything you want for her. Having a "fat and healthy" baby myself, I couldn't imagine a skinny baby. I love a belly on a baby, and dempled elbows and knees, and big cheeks. When else will demples like that be that cute?

[Jen]

I'm sure Annabella will grow up to be a beautiful young lady - besides, what she's got now is just baby fat and she'll burn it off as soon as she is able to run around the house like a maniac! :)

[weirdal27]

I was a fat baby to, but i turned out skinny as could be :)

[CoolB]

I agree with WheelMan, with you as her mom I'm sure A will grow up to be all those things and more. And if for some strange reason when she's older and tries to listen to what the "world" says just let her read all the messags archived on the blog saying otherwise. I mean all us commenters can't be wrong, right?

[Dabodius]

POLONIUS.This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.
(Hamlet, Act I, Scene 3)
You will teach her that some selves have bigger persons and are no less worthy of being true to for that.

[Leslie]

She'll learn more from watching you than what anyone else will tell her. If you're happy in your skin, she will be confident, happy, and healthy, too.

[Brenden]

When me and my brother were younger I was the tall skinny one and he was the short chubby one. Sometime during our teenage years the roles reversed. It really doesn't matter how big Annabella is now.

[Les]

Just to add, a chubby baby is a *good* thing - when they're not, worry. (I had one who came home and failed to thrive, as the pediatricians say. It meant a trip back to the hospital for him, for about a week, but they finally figured out what was up.) She'll likely run it all off when she gets up on two, but don't think you're doing anything wrong! Babies and toddlers *need* extra fat. It's brain food. :)

[Daniel]

Hi Megan,

While I agree with the others that Annabella's baby fat will take care of itself, your concern seems to be more future/lifestyle oriented.

In that vein I highly recommend Walter Willett's book, "Eat, Drink, and Be Healthy: The Harvard Medical School Guide to Healthy Eating". It's been out for a while but I find it a real common-sense approach to food based on the best information available at this time (he makes pretty clear which recommendations are backed by solid science and which are less proven but reasonably safe bets).

It is not really a "diet" as say an Atkins, South Beach, etc. but more of a food lifestyle guide. It includes the new Harvard “food pyramid”, which has received a lot of press in the last year or two.

I recommend it not as a "diet" for Annabella but as a possible reference for your whole family that could help reinforce healthy eating habits. (By the way, based on your great pictures, I doubt if any of you have habits that are that bad to begin with).

Anyway, my 2 cents. Here is the Amazon link and another link to a magazine article about Walter Willett:

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0743223225/qid=1077558412/sr=2-1/ref=sr_2_1/103-6171278-1182206

http://www.eatingwell.com/articles_recipes/nutrition/willett.html

Good eating!

[Paul]

Her genes will decide if she's fat or not. But your positive outlook and your love for life will teach her to love herself.

Don't worry, be happy.

[vakky]

Sounds like you got the whole mom thing figured out, Megan. Don't spoil her too much though :P

[Jeanne]

One reason I initially liked you so much on s-savers was you weren't a skinny mini model! You were real, a happy face and sweet dispostion. It was GREAT to know I could be like you.
I miss your presence there!

5 years later, life is good and if you focus Anabelle to what she CAN accomplish with a 'jolly' attitude, skinny or fat, people will enjoy her company. (As I do yours, now, here.)

Thanks for staying friends with us - your fans - via web.

[Michael Finds Arabia]

I have read a few of these and now realise this is only about mothers and infants at this site.. maybe just this part of the site.

Now I have read quite a few of these things, I think motherhood is a little odd, and maybe a little bit like a cult.

Will men ever get to feel what mothers do do you think?

[Michael Finds Arabia]

If you're concerned about your bubby being chubby, or the bubs having no chance of being thin, Remember she's got 5 feet 2 more growing to fit into her skin.