megan at jumpingmonkeys dot com

What if you took a piece of raw hamburger meat and left it in a petri dish in the sun for two years? I imagine it would look a lot like the inbox for my megan@techtv.com email account.

Over the past two years megan@techtv.com has been posted all over the techtv.com website. I've used it to register and test thousands of free downloads. I've used it to create accounts at fly-by-night websites that turned out to be little more than email address harvesters. I've mentioned it almost daily on television and some people watching have found it amusing to use it as their own to sign up for all manner of online endeavors that all seem to lead to the same place-- more spam for me.

You think you have spam? I have spam. I have so much spam that even my favorite spam filters sometimes just digitally sigh and give up the battle. For now, it's time for me to give up the battle too.

After maternity leave I will begin checking my megan@techtv.com email account again, but until then I'm giving it up to petri dish powers. If you want to contact me, you can do so at megan@jumpingmonkeys.com. And, of course, you can always post a comment here.

I don't promise that I'll have time reply to all your mail, but I can promise (at least until the spammers seize this account too) that I'll read it.

megan at jumpingmonkeys dot com

What if you took a piece of raw hamburger meat and left it in a petri dish in the sun for two years? I imagine it would look a lot like the inbox for my megan@techtv.com email account.

Over the past two years megan@techtv.com has been posted all over the techtv.com website. I've used it to register and test thousands of free downloads. I've used it to create accounts at fly-by-night websites that turned out to be little more than email address harvesters. I've mentioned it almost daily on television and some people watching have found it amusing to use it as their own to sign up for all manner of online endeavors that all seem to lead to the same place-- more spam for me.

You think you have spam? I have spam. I have so much spam that even my favorite spam filters sometimes just digitally sigh and give up the battle. For now, it's time for me to give up the battle too.

After maternity leave I will begin checking my megan@techtv.com email account again, but until then I'm giving it up to petri dish powers. If you want to contact me, you can do so at megan@jumpingmonkeys.com. And, of course, you can always post a comment here.

I don't promise that I'll have time reply to all your mail, but I can promise (at least until the spammers seize this account too) that I'll read it.

Pregnancy Bookshelf

As the waiting game continues, I thought I'd share some of the books that I've enjoyed over the last 9 months. Can this be considered the virtual nesting instinct? The Pregnancy Journal This was one of my pregnancy essentials (right up there with the body pillow). It is definitely my favorite pregnancy book. As soon as you know your due date, enter it into the end of the book and then fill in all the dates backwards. Now you have a customized calendar that tells you every thing that's going on with you and the baby for the next nine months, from raisin stage to watermelon stage. Here's a hint: if you experience morning sickness you'll find that raisin stage is just about as uncomfortable as watermelon stage. The Pregnancy Journal also features occasional tidbits about childbirth in other cultures and throughout history. These usually involve squatting. Your Pregnancy Week by Week If you want something more technical, this book is the way to go. I appreciated the sketches that show what the baby looks like inside you each week. Like the Pregnancy Journal, Your Pregnancy also tells you what size fruit your baby is at each stage. What is with the fruit comparison? Warning: Some weeks are dedicated entirely to worst case scenarios. This can be upsetting at the time, but now that I haven't had to experience any of these worst cases I find those chapters strangely comforting. There are also scattered helpful tips for dad, which I found incredibly helpful to me as they often include suggestions of how he should be pampering you. What to Expect When You're Expecting I'm certain I'm not the first person to recommend this book to you. It takes the month-by-month look at pregnancy, which you'll probably find is more accurate than the day-by-day or even the week-by-week. In some ways our pregnant bodies are machines, but some work at different speeds than others. A sister of a friend of mine gave me some good advice about "What to Expect." She told me that right when she found out she was pregnant she bought this book and read it cover to cover. It scared her to death. She made me swear that I wouldn't do this. I have a confession to make. I stopped reading this one at around 7 months. That's when my childbirth education classes took over. I preferred learning from a real person because I could ask all the questions I wanted. You can ask a book questions, but it might not answer. The Girlfriend's Guide To Pregnancy This is a great first pregnancy book to read, especially if you're like me and you were actually surprised when you realized that you wanted to be a mom. One thing about The Girlfriend's Guide that turned me off was the chapter that recommends that you don't exercise. I've exercised at least 3 days per week since my morning sickness subsided. For me exercise has never been about looking better. Before I got pregnant, I was pretty comfortable with being a normal-sized woman. Not normal like what magazines will have you believe is normal, but really normal. I still exercised because it made me feel good. That doesn't change in pregnancy. You don't want to exercise to lose weight in pregnancy, but the other benefits are amazing. The jury is still out as to whether exercise will help me in labor, but it certainly made me feel better and sleep better. Of course, talk to your doctor about what kind of exercise you should do. Baby Bargains Don't start thinking about all the gear you need to buy until the beginning of your third trimester. It will make your head hurt. When you do start thinking about it, invest in this book. I'm not saying that your head won't hurt, but it may hurt a little less. Baby Bargains tells you what you need and what you don't need and where to buy everything, from crib to clothes to everything in between. Sometimes what the authors of this book considered a bargain still seemed pretty expensive to me, but the book is still a great resource. After I've proven that the stuff we've amassed is actually useful, I hope to post another page like this devoted to my gear recommendations. Whether I have time to do this will be another story. Fit Pregnancy Magazine Every time my mom came to visit me she brought me an issue of this magazine. If you like Self magazine in your non-pregnant life, you'll probably like Fit Pregnancy in your pregnant life. I like the fact that this magazine interviews pregnant celebrities. I won't lie to you, I was secretly absorbed with the pregnancies of both Kelli Ripa and Catherine Zeta Jones. FYI: Catherine Zeta Jones had to have been lip-synching her performance at the Oscars. She's due a week after me and I get winded when I belt out one verse of Tom Petty's American Girl in the car with the windows rolled down. American Baby Magazine I'm not going to say that this is the best childcare magazine out there. It just happens to be another one that my mom gave me a subscription to. And moms know best, right? This magazine took over around the 8th month when I started to lose interest in what was happening to my body and gain interest in the being that was going to soon make her appearance. One thing you'll learn in the later months of pregnancy is that there are several very different metnods of parenting and everyone thinks that their method is right. So far I prefer childcare magazines to childcare books because the magazines represent several different theories of child rearing, as opposed to just one. Finally, I want to recommend Pregnant While You Work: A Practical Guide to Having a Baby and a Job. Yes, it was written by my mother-in-law. Yes, it was written nearly 10 years ago. Yes, it helped me adjust to the last nine months as a pregnant woman in the workplace. I wish she would write another book like this because she has a lot of really honest, useful and sane advice about the 9 months of insanity that is working while pregnant.

Pregnancy Bookshelf

As the waiting game continues, I thought I'd share some of the books that I've enjoyed over the last 9 months. Can this be considered the virtual nesting instinct?

The Pregnancy Journal

This was one of my pregnancy essentials (right up there with the body pillow). It is definitely my favorite pregnancy book.

As soon as you know your due date, enter it into the end of the book and then fill in all the dates backwards. Now you have a customized calendar that tells you every thing that's going on with you and the baby for the next nine months, from raisin stage to watermelon stage. Here's a hint: if you experience morning sickness you'll find that raisin stage is just about as uncomfortable as watermelon stage.

The Pregnancy Journal also features occasional tidbits about childbirth in other cultures and throughout history. These usually involve squatting.

Your Pregnancy Week by Week

If you want something more technical, this book is the way to go. I appreciated the sketches that show what the baby looks like inside you each week. Like the Pregnancy Journal, Your Pregnancy also tells you what size fruit your baby is at each stage. What is with the fruit comparison?

Warning: Some weeks are dedicated entirely to worst case scenarios. This can be upsetting at the time, but now that I haven't had to experience any of these worst cases I find those chapters strangely comforting.

There are also scattered helpful tips for dad, which I found incredibly helpful to me as they often include suggestions of how he should be pampering you.

What to Expect When You're Expecting

I'm certain I'm not the first person to recommend this book to you. It takes the month-by-month look at pregnancy, which you'll probably find is more accurate than the day-by-day or even the week-by-week. In some ways our pregnant bodies are machines, but some work at different speeds than others.

A sister of a friend of mine gave me some good advice about "What to Expect." She told me that right when she found out she was pregnant she bought this book and read it cover to cover. It scared her to death. She made me swear that I wouldn't do this.

I have a confession to make. I stopped reading this one at around 7 months. That's when my childbirth education classes took over. I preferred learning from a real person because I could ask all the questions I wanted. You can ask a book questions, but it might not answer.

The Girlfriend's Guide To Pregnancy

This is a great first pregnancy book to read, especially if you're like me and you were actually surprised when you realized that you wanted to be a mom. One thing about The Girlfriend's Guide that turned me off was the chapter that recommends that you don't exercise. I've exercised at least 3 days per week since my morning sickness subsided. For me exercise has never been about looking better. Before I got pregnant, I was pretty comfortable with being a normal-sized woman. Not normal like what magazines will have you believe is normal, but really normal. I still exercised because it made me feel good. That doesn't change in pregnancy.

You don't want to exercise to lose weight in pregnancy, but the other benefits are amazing. The jury is still out as to whether exercise will help me in labor, but it certainly made me feel better and sleep better. Of course, talk to your doctor about what kind of exercise you should do.

Baby Bargains
Don't start thinking about all the gear you need to buy until the beginning of your third trimester. It will make your head hurt. When you do start thinking about it, invest in this book. I'm not saying that your head won't hurt, but it may hurt a little less.

Baby Bargains tells you what you need and what you don't need and where to buy everything, from crib to clothes to everything in between. Sometimes what the authors of this book considered a bargain still seemed pretty expensive to me, but the book is still a great resource.

After I've proven that the stuff we've amassed is actually useful, I hope to post another page like this devoted to my gear recommendations. Whether I have time to do this will be another story.

Fit Pregnancy Magazine

Every time my mom came to visit me she brought me an issue of this magazine. If you like Self magazine in your non-pregnant life, you'll probably like Fit Pregnancy in your pregnant life.

I like the fact that this magazine interviews pregnant celebrities. I won't lie to you, I was secretly absorbed with the pregnancies of both Kelli Ripa and Catherine Zeta Jones. FYI: Catherine Zeta Jones had to have been lip-synching her performance at the Oscars. She's due a week after me and I get winded when I belt out one verse of Tom Petty's American Girl in the car with the windows rolled down.

American Baby Magazine

I'm not going to say that this is the best childcare magazine out there. It just happens to be another one that my mom gave me a subscription to. And moms know best, right? This magazine took over around the 8th month when I started to lose interest in what was happening to my body and gain interest in the being that was going to soon make her appearance.

One thing you'll learn in the later months of pregnancy is that there are several very different metnods of parenting and everyone thinks that their method is right. So far I prefer childcare magazines to childcare books because the magazines represent several different theories of child rearing, as opposed to just one.

Finally, I want to recommend Pregnant While You Work: A Practical Guide to Having a Baby and a Job. Yes, it was written by my mother-in-law. Yes, it was written nearly 10 years ago. Yes, it helped me adjust to the last nine months as a pregnant woman in the workplace. I wish she would write another book like this because she has a lot of really honest, useful and sane advice about the 9 months of insanity that is working while pregnant.

At a Time Like This

A few days ago Dan posted a comment here asking me how it felt to be bringing life into a world that is in this kind of turmoil. Here's my opinion.

My parents chose to bring me into the world during Vietnam. My grandparents chose to bring my father into the world during World War II. My great-grandparents chose to bring my grandmother into the world during World War I.

When is a good time to bring a child into this world? Can the answers be never and always?

It's like Plato might have said --"Only the dead have seen the end of war."

I say "Plato might have said" because it turns out that this quote, which most people, including me, rememember not from their frequent readings of Plato, but from the beginning of the movie Black Hawk Down, may not have come from Plato.

The point is that someone said it and that someone was right.

At a Time Like This

A few days ago Dan posted a comment here asking me how it felt to be bringing life into a world that is in this kind of turmoil. Here's my opinion.

My parents chose to bring me into the world during Vietnam. My grandparents chose to bring my father into the world during World War II. My great-grandparents chose to bring my grandmother into the world during World War I.

When is a good time to bring a child into this world? Can the answers be never and always?

It's like Plato might have said --"Only the dead have seen the end of war."

I say "Plato might have said" because it turns out that this quote, which most people, including me, rememember not from their frequent readings of Plato, but from the beginning of the movie Black Hawk Down, may not have come from Plato.

The point is that someone said it and that someone was right.

Keeping Score

I find that reading about the war from online news sources is a much saner way for me to learn what's going on than by watching TV or listening to the radio.

In particular, I've come to really respect Thomas Friedman's Op-Ed columns in the New York Times. Here's a quote from today's:

I was in a restaurant at Chicago's O'Hare Airport on Sunday, and it had an NCAA basketball game playing on the TV at one end of the bar and the Iraq war on the other. Most people were watching the basketball game — probably because it's so much easier to keep score.

Read the full column (free registration is required)

Keeping Score

I find that reading about the war from online news sources is a much saner way for me to learn what's going on than by watching TV or listening to the radio.

In particular, I've come to really respect Thomas Friedman's Op-Ed columns in the New York Times. Here's a quote from today's:

I was in a restaurant at Chicago's O'Hare Airport on Sunday, and it had an NCAA basketball game playing on the TV at one end of the bar and the Iraq war on the other. Most people were watching the basketball game — probably because it's so much easier to keep score.

Read the full column (free registration is required)

Advice from the Most Pregnant Person in the World - First Trimester

Everyone is an expert at something. I happen to be an expert on pregnancy. Sure, I'm not the only person who's ever been pregnant. But currently I am the most pregnant person in the world.

For what it's worth, here are some things that I wish the most pregnant person in the world had told me.

1. Keep quiet early.
   Most people know that when you find out you're pregnant, you should not tell anyone until after the first trimester. I was pretty good about this, with a few exceptions. The only problem was that I had forgotten to keep quiet long before that.

   Marco and I dated for 6 years before we got married, so you can imagine that during those 6 years I was forced to spend a lot of time dodging people's queries about when we were going to "settle down." I thought the dodging was over after the wedding, but the truth is it goes on, just with a different question.

   I have no idea why I was compelled to answer people when they asked me when we planned to start trying to get pregnant. Maybe I answered with a specific time because I wanted to seem responsible and "settled down." What this meant, however, was that after the planned date passed people constantly asked "Are you pregnant yet?" In those first three months that I wasn't the constant questioning managed to convince me that I was most certainly infertile. If they asked in the first three months after I was pregnant, I had to lie. This leads me to my second piece of advice:

2. Embrace the lie.
   If people ask you if you're pregnant and you are and you're not ready to tell them, lie. They deserve to be lied to. It's none of their business. And the truth is when they actually hear the good news they'll be so happy for you that they'll probably forget that you lied to them. If not, then drop them. In a few months you'll be way too tired to waste your time with people who can't forgive you for keeping this secret.

3. Don't believe home pregnancy tests.
   The first few we took said we weren't pregnant and we were. I'm sorry to scare everyone, but this is the truth. Maybe it was because it was one of those cheapo home pregnancy tests, in which case here's another piece of advice:

4. Don't buy those cheapo home pregnancy tests.

5. Find a doctor you love now.
   I didn't and now I'm sorry.

6. Don't buy maternity clothes yet.
   In fact, don't even think about buying maternity clothes. Enjoy wearing your real clothes now. You'll miss them.

7. Starting now every person in the world will want to give you advice. Sometimes these people are right. Sometimes they're wrong. Sometimes right when their advice starts to get good, they get tired and stop writing in their weblog so they can get some sleep.

Advice from the Most Pregnant Person in the World - First Trimester

Everyone is an expert at something. I happen to be an expert on pregnancy. Sure, I'm not the only person who's ever been pregnant. But currently I am the most pregnant person in the world.

For what it's worth, here are some things that I wish the most pregnant person in the world had told me.

1. Keep quiet early.
   Most people know that when you find out you're pregnant, you should not tell anyone until after the first trimester. I was pretty good about this, with a few exceptions. The only problem was that I had forgotten to keep quiet long before that.

   Marco and I dated for 6 years before we got married, so you can imagine that during those 6 years I was forced to spend a lot of time dodging people's queries about when we were going to "settle down." I thought the dodging was over after the wedding, but the truth is it goes on, just with a different question.

   I have no idea why I was compelled to answer people when they asked me when we planned to start trying to get pregnant. Maybe I answered with a specific time because I wanted to seem responsible and "settled down." What this meant, however, was that after the planned date passed people constantly asked "Are you pregnant yet?" In those first three months that I wasn't the constant questioning managed to convince me that I was most certainly infertile. If they asked in the first three months after I was pregnant, I had to lie. This leads me to my second piece of advice:

2. Embrace the lie.
   If people ask you if you're pregnant and you are and you're not ready to tell them, lie. They deserve to be lied to. It's none of their business. And the truth is when they actually hear the good news they'll be so happy for you that they'll probably forget that you lied to them. If not, then drop them. In a few months you'll be way too tired to waste your time with people who can't forgive you for keeping this secret.

3. Don't believe home pregnancy tests.
   The first few we took said we weren't pregnant and we were. I'm sorry to scare everyone, but this is the truth. Maybe it was because it was one of those cheapo home pregnancy tests, in which case here's another piece of advice:

4. Don't buy those cheapo home pregnancy tests.

5. Find a doctor you love now.
   I didn't and now I'm sorry.

6. Don't buy maternity clothes yet.
   In fact, don't even think about buying maternity clothes. Enjoy wearing your real clothes now. You'll miss them.

7. Starting now every person in the world will want to give you advice. Sometimes these people are right. Sometimes they're wrong. Sometimes right when their advice starts to get good, they get tired and stop writing in their weblog so they can get some sleep.